Every evening Cousin Jimmy, who is also living with Dave and Sally, and I sit on the couch. We watch tv and discuss the days happenings. It is quite the little routine we have gotten ourselves into. Well, the discussion last night, along with previous nights, has been his lenghth of phone conversations with his wife. He talks to Karen every evening for about 5 minutes or so. She lives in Casper, but will be moving to Gillette this summer...anyway. I have been giving Jimmy a bad time because they don't talk for very long and he doesn't seem to be too interested in what she is saying and his "I love you" is kind of weak. I told him last night that he needs to be better at his phone converstaion skills and really say "I love you" with some heart!On the flip side, Jimmy gives me a bad time for stopping what I am doing at 9:00 everynight so I can talk to Jeremiah. He and I will talk sometimes an hour and a half in the evenings, not always, but sometimes. Jimmy says that wait until I have been married for 10 years...Jeremiah and I won't talk that long on the phone with each other anymore and the "I love you" won't be said as longingly as it is now. I disagree. I hope that we are even deeper in love and still have things to talk about.
6 comments:
I do believe it depends on the work/time/effort we put into our marriages. The amount of time spent on the phone doesn't necessarily matter, but it's the quality. I still get butterflies when I hear Jason's 'ring' on my phone! I remember talking to Jason for HOURS when dating/engaged. And now we can talk for a long time or just a few minutes. Our love has deepened in ways I never imagined it would or that it could get any better than it was before we were married. But, it has... :)
Well, Joe and I have been married for 16 years, almost 17 and we still talk on the phone, GTalk, or texting. And when we are apart, we talk more. It takes work, and it is worth it. :)
How about we here fom Jimmy...So here I go. The sense of a relationship does not hinge on the length of call or the strength of the voice, but soley on the meaning of it all. I have been living in Gillette while my family is in Casper for almost a year now. We are building a new home, and the rest of the family waits on Shelby to graduate from high school(she is my step daughter and will be graduting as a Junior). I have known Karen for 12 years and we will be married for 11 in August of this year. Our life together has been spent with me traveling for most of it. This move to Gillette will put us together every day and night for the first time. It is the past 12 years that has set the course of our lives. We have seen the highest of highs and the lowest of lows,both have had me driving 700 miles to get home to spend them with her. But with every day I call her at 6am to tell her good morning, 4 or 5 times during the day and again in the evening to tell he goodnight, never once without I Love You. Not just the words but the true meaning. I guess if I can offer some advice to the newlyweds, it would be not to worry about the quanity of the call. Call them just to hear their vioce and say that you love them, some times that is all you have to do. As you you grow together, you will understand how those 3 little words can describe things that you cannot be said in an hour. Do not worry if 10 years from now you do not talk for hours on the phone when you are apart,but relaize that you love each other more than the day you met and the best of youe lives are yet to come.
That is very true, Jimmy. We don't really understand that until we are married. Then we understand things more just as you've said.
Jimmy is validated!!, but then so is Amanda!! A tie for you both. Scott and I have been married for almost 16 years. There have been times in our marriage where his job has involved traveling alot. When he is gone, I still have a hard time going to bed. Sometimes it's because I miss having him next to me, other times I enjoy my space. There are times when we can still talk on the phone for hours when we are apart. He doesn't travel much anymore, but he has been out of town this week. I tell you what, I enjoyed hearing his voice just as much on this trip as I did 15 years ago. Yes, he still does that to me.
Our marriage, our commitment to each other and our connection has strengthened over the years. Sometimes we can sit and say nothing, other times we can talk like we haven't seen each other for weeks. It doesn't matter the length of the conversation, what matters is that he knows me and what I am needing at any given moment, sometimes with a suttle hint, sometimes not. I am just as excited when he walks through that door as I was the first time he walked in. Love is GREAT!!
Marriages grow and change. "Feelings" fluctuate. Commitment does not. It is hard to imagine before you are married that your love could get any deeper, more passionate or stronger than what it is right now. However, after being married for over 20 years, I can tell you that it DOES get better - deeper, more passionate, stronger - for having gone through the ups and downs, good times and really, really hard times. (I wouldn't have believed it before I was married, either.) It is hard to explain or define. Kind of like explaining calculus to a kindergartner. We need to grasp 1+1 first and then progress to through the more advanced math.) I only know it is true for us. It takes work and it may not always be the same romantic emotion you are feeling in these days before you are married, but it will be BETTER. At least that how it has been for me. I love my husband more now than I ever could have even understood back then. AND THE GREAT PART IS THIS: when I talked to a woman in our church who has been married for over 60 years, she assured me that it only gets better with time. She said it made her sad when people divorced because she said they can't imagine how much better their love can get if they just give it some time. Well, that's just my 2 cents' worth. Wishing you all the best in your love story.
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